The cross : Is it more difficult for a young man to seduce in the #MeToo era?
Christine Castelain-Meunier: With #MeToo, the seduction market has become more complicated for them. This vast movement of debate on consent has pushed them to ask themselves questions that are sometimes new to them, including this one: what do girls really like? It is no longer enough to adopt the somewhat macho codes of virility to be sure to seduce. Also, boys must reinvent themselves to conform to the more demanding expectations of girls.
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How did the boys adapt?
CC-M. : They got to talking a lot more with the girls, and today’s young men get to know them better than ever. Also, they guide them. They are undergoing a very profound transformation: they are redefining the masculine in a sense that is, in my opinion, that of humanization, based on what they understand of the expectations of girls.
In this vast movement, digital uses play a very important role. As many exchanges and meetings now take place on applications, boys must know how to stage themselves, develop certain skills that we did not necessarily ask of them before: express themselves well, have centers of interest, a some creativity. Thus, the masculine ideal today is the blogger. The young men realized that in order to create the spark, they too must develop these skills of empathy and expression.
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The self-image is also more important: they talk more, as evidenced by the success of bodybuilding. They also display certain more empathetic values, particularly around ecology. Now Prince Charming walks or rides a bike, whereas he had a two-wheeler or a car a few decades ago! All of these developments can be explained by an attempt to remain competitive, as girls become more and more demanding.
Do they live well the time?
CC-M. : Like any questioning, this is experienced differently. Nevertheless, some young men are relieved since #MeToo, because it has cleaned up male culture. They no longer need to look manly in front of their buddies. Dirty thoughts about girls no longer pay, which sets them free. For many, this way of being was not, in fact, what they wanted.
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We can nevertheless regret that they receive very little help, that few positive models have emerged. Cinema, popular culture, rap, are still often based on old-fashioned behavior. Admittedly, the films, the songs question the genre and the relationship to the norm a lot, but that is another question. Many young boys expect first and foremost to be shown how to be a man.
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